Politics 2/4

Jun 4, 20221 min read

Conservative claims pronouns “don't exist” despite insisting his own children address him as ‘Sir’

IRONY: American-flag waving, Republican die-hard, Hugh Jass (unfortunately a he/him), has made the bold claim that pronouns “don’t...

Jun 4, 20221 min read

Mystery surrounds newly appointed Liberal Party leader as it's revealed "he must not be named"

HE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED: The new leader of the Libs, P*ter D*tton, is arguably most known to the Australian public for his striking...

Jun 4, 20221 min read

Second leak from the US Supreme Court on Roe v. Wade decision just an entire copy of Handmaid's Tale

After leaked documents from the US Supreme Court revealed the Justices’ potential decision to overturn Roe v. Wade and deny basic human...

May 28, 20221 min read

BREAKING: PeDu officially ruled out as potential nickname for ScoMo's successor

BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD! After the success of the ScoMo nickname for former Prime Minister Scott Morrison, the Liberals are desperately...

May 28, 20221 min read

Australians suffer through another day of oppressive gun control

WHEN WILL IT STOP? Australians were seen protesting in the streets today against the harsh gun control laws in the country. Citizens...

May 28, 20221 min read

Legalise Cannabis Party make righteous claim to "The Greens" title

The national party of 420 blazers are making claim to the Greens title, arguing over a bong circle that “it just works, dude! Like you...

May 28, 20221 min read

Pauline Hanson considers 'chucking a trump' after election disaster

"You mean I'm not popular?!?" Pauline Hanson and her One Nation party are in disbelief today after current polling shows that they will...

May 28, 20221 min read

Scott Morrison delivers his losing message via video call from Hawaiian beach

After losing the election, Scott Morrison, no longer the Prime Minister, delivered his losing message to the country via a video call....

May 22, 20221 min read

Clive Palmer stumped on how all those YouTube ads didn't make him Prime Minister

3rd time lucky? After drowning Australians in political ads back in 2019 to no avail, Clive Palmer decided to have a second go at it,...

May 22, 20221 min read

Polling centre slammed for only selling vegan democracy sausages

A local polling centre has come under fire on election day as it was revealed that they only had vegan sausages available, with no meat...

May 22, 20221 min read

First time voter chooses candidate based on who has the most interesting name

Johnny, 19, has embraced the opportunity to have a say in the future leadership of Australia. He has done this by not looking into his...

May 22, 20221 min read

ScoMo still claims he can be empathetic, despite literally bulldozing a child

While out spending a disproportionate amount of time campaigning in Tasmania, Scott Morrison saw fit to partake in a friendly soccer game...

May 22, 20221 min read

Volunteers hand out single-use plastic water bottles to thirsty local climate protesters

Last week, unprepared protesters were sent through the wringer in a local climate rally after some members forgot to pack water in their...

May 22, 20221 min read

Politician unsure if 20 "Vote me Number 1" posters on single power pole enough to sway voters

As election campaigns ramp up in the lead up for next Saturday's federal election, politicians have been quick to plaster every free...

May 10, 20221 min read

Albanese finishes 60 Minutes election debate with a freestyle rap

At the end of the 60 Minutes special, 'The Great Debate', where PM Scott Morrison and Anthony Albanese answered questions about their...

May 10, 20221 min read

Scott Morrison launches new YouTube react channel in last ditch effort to gain youth votes

With the federal election less than a month away, PM Scott Morrison has found out that the best way to gain youth support is not by...

May 10, 20221 min read

Biden sends Duolingo Bird as military aid to Ukraine

After seeing how the Duolingo Bird has instilled fear into the hearts of Tik Tok users, American President Biden has decided to send the...

May 4, 20221 min read

BREAKING: Constructive dialogue about Depp-Heard Trial Ruined by Men's Rights Activist

A lively and constructive discussion at a local Brisbane Pub today about what the world can learn about victim blaming and the horrors of...

May 4, 20221 min read

Local 'Spot the Difference' Champion Stumped on Latest 'Liberal vs Labor Policy' Level

"They both look the exact same!". These were the defeated words of local 'spot the difference' enthusiast, Callum, 22, who couldn't find...

May 4, 20221 min read

Millennial throws up after accidentally opening news.com.au

Sarah, 29, made a grave mistake this morning when she opened an article from Facebook titled 'Why HOUSE prices are ACTUALLY going DOWN',...